5 Sporting Rules For Parents

5 Sporting Rules For Parents

Do you think there need to be sporting rules for parents? This post is my ranting and raving about how stupid our kids playing sports makes us as parents and what we can do to fix it. 

When we adopted seven years ago, my husband and I had dreams of watching our kids play sports. Since hubs loves and passionately loves basketball, he was hoping for two basketball players. We were both surprised how quickly soccer came into our lives and in the last few years, has completely consumed our family time.

With a kid in junior high and one still in elementary school, I was shocked to learn that their competitive soccer schedules requires us to still be outside our home anywhere between 5-7 times a week. With the last month off, spending time as a family and living without a schedule, I have the WORST attitude about such a strenuous stress on our time continuing this week. In fact, if throwing a fit like a full on toddler helps describe my behavior, then take that imagery and run with it.

Before you lecture me on all of the good that sports can teach kids about self-esteem, life and teamwork, believe me when I tell you: I already know sports can be valuable to kids. I played team sports through high school and some of those relationships lasted my entire life. I learned devotion, how to be a good teammate and I’ve written before that it was a great relationship builder between my father and I.

Most of the time other than the time, money and effort we expend in chase of a black and white ball, what I hate the most about soccer season is the parents. Whether it is parents on our own team, the opposing teams’ parents or a combination of both, watching grown people making asses of themselves in public and without regard of their children’s reactions should be amusing. Mostly, though, I just want to cry.

I started wearing headphones two season ago during the games and it has helped avoid being caught up in the nonsense of the moment. So since the season is upon us, perhaps imposing rules on parents during sporting events will reduce the ridiculous parenting behavior during their children’s games.

Here would be my first five sporting rules for parents for this upcoming season:

  1. Each adult is to wear headphones during the entire length of the event. If you do not have headphones, you are required to share with a parent from the opposing team. Amazon is full of a great selection of headphones if you would like to shop there.
  2. Before the start of the game, each adult will be assigned a child from the opposing team for whom to cheer. You will be introduced to the child’s family before the game and will be given a quiz about that child’s likes, dislikes and family dynamic during halftime. Should you fail to participate or fail the exam, a fine will be imposed of no less than $100.*
  3. Each adult in attendance at the event, must cheer for each goal scored regardless of which team with which your child is participating. Scoring at anything in life is hard. But doing it with lots of people watching and coaches and kids screaming at you should be doubly celebrated by both sides of the field. Should any adult be caught not cheering during a score of the opposing team, a point/goal/touchdown/home run will be added to the opposing team’s score.
  4. Each adult shall at the start of each game, register a valid credit card will be left at the registration desk and assigned to your child’s specific jersey number. Should you fail to comply with any rules set forth herein, a fine of $100 dollars* will be deducted to your card. If you are going to be a jack ass, you should be held accountable and hopefully, your wallet is where you will be hit the most.
  5. Before leaving the field, you will be required to shake the hands of both coaches and complement at least one of the officials. Most of them are volunteers and a “Thank You” goes a long way. Should you fail to follow this rule, you will be fined $100.

*Any and all proceeds of said fines will be divided between the teams and specifically set aside for children who cannot afford to play. Continued violation of these rules will result of being permanently banned from attending your child’s sporting events.

Do you have any sporting rules for parents that you think need to be implemented? Let me know in the comments. I want to add them to my ever growing list!

Lindsey Andrews
About me

Attorney & Author. Always in search for daily joy.


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